I hear it's time to be honest. 

I hear it's time to be honest.

There's been a recent call for honesty; which could be for all but Lacy and Tori's relationship, But that's none of my business, is it? It used to be. It was odd, so I'm grateful that my share of their time has been ended.

"A self loathing creature dressed up in angel wings."
That's what he told me he thought when he first saw me.
And when he first spoke to me, he told me thought,
"Someone not meant for a world as cold as this. Was he born to cold? He was clipped from ice and made of skin."

I don't understand him. Him being Joshua. He thinks that just because we've exchanged a few words here and there, that just because he watches me- that he knows me. And he couldn't be any more wrong about it. Sure he could tell me my middle name, my favorite color, and probably some of my darkest secrets.
But he can't tell me the color I see the sky as. He can't tell me what shade of green and grey the ocean is when I'm standing above it. He can't tell me who I want most in the world.
And he can't tell me the dreams I have.

He says I want to be a nurse. I laugh.
"A doctor, then."
What makes you think I want to be a healer?
"You are a healer."
How so?
"You mended broken hearts."
I laugh again.
"With that very same laugh. With that very same smile."
I stare at him, long and hard enough to make him squirm.
"Don't look at me like that."
Like what, I ask.
"Like I'm ripping you open to expose you to the world."
That hurt. I look away, and he hugs me from behind.
"You can't play superman all the time."
Are heroes supposed to cry? I tell him I'm afraid.
"Of what?"

I'm afraid...of rejection.

And he nods, but he doesn't understand. Silly little boy; how can you hope to win me over if you can't tell me why I look away from the stars with a burning shame in my eyes?